fear of samadhi

Charles A. Hillig chillig at JETLINK.NET
Tue Feb 11 12:00:39 CST 1997

At 08:51 AM 2/11/97 -0500, you wrote:
>                                      Matrenamah
>I am waiting to see your comments on the topic, especially why there is so
>much fear to cross the border from known to unknown, from identity to

     Your fear of samadhi is always in direct proportion to the degree of
separation that you believe exists between you and the Self.

     In order to look with a "beginner's mind," you need to let go of all of
your thoughts, feelings, philosophies, opinions, theories, considerations,
beliefs, positions, memories, possessions, future plans,  points of view,
etc. etc.

     Empty hands, empty mind, empty heart.

     As Meister Eckhart once said, "Everything is meant to be lost so that
the soul can stand alone in unhampered nothingness."

     If you believe that samadhi is possible only after you struggle hard to
"wake up," then it presuposses that this "non-event"   will  take  place in
linear time and can be positioned on a calendar.

     But, in truth, there was never a "time" when you were NOT enlightened.
     There will never be a "time" when you WILL be enlightened.

     Since any apparent awakening or realization "takes place" quite outside
of linear time, it is, basically, timeless.

     You are already the Self....
                          and IT is, seemingly, pretending that IT's not the

     Why does the Self  seemingly play this "game of pretending" that
Maharshi talked about?  (Maybe the real question should be "Well, why not?!)
Either way, though, the answer is inscrutable.

     There's nothing that "you" can do to speed up your awakening because
nothing is really happening here.  In fact, nothing has ever happened and
nothing will ever happen.  There is no do-er and there's no separate one to
do anything to, with or for.   The best that you can probably say is that
everything is always "happening" at the exact same second, which , of
course, is the inescapable Here and Now.  The totality of IT is always

     Maybe the fear of samadhi serves a useful purpose at one level:........
           By pretending that we're something/somewhere, we can seemingly
avoid (at least for a while)  the apparent "horror" of being nothing/nowhere.

     It's all quite paradoxical and even a bit ironic:  we love to fear as
much as we fear to love.

     Remember, though, that "you" are not "here."  Since only the Self is
present, free will is completely illusory.  You cannot choose to walk either
the path of the saint OR the path of the sinner.    And, whatever your
believe about that statement, you can't even choose that you are "choosing"
to believe that.

     You , as the undivided Self, however, do not have a "destiny."

     But there is no way to escape the destiny of your historical (although
illusory) ego-self.    As Corneille said, "Do your duty and leave the rest
to heaven."

                                                    With Blessings,
                                                                Chuck Hillig

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