[Advaita-l] SELF- REALIZATION

[KAMESWARARAO MULA]

Dear all,
               In continuation to my posting on SRIVIDYA, I am here putting the human reflections which can make  to realize the self. 
   
  With regads
  Kameswara Rao
   
  Reflections
  1.        You often ask me - where am I ? what is this existence ? what am I here for ? and I always ask you to ask first - who am I ? because unless you know about you, all other questions and answers will remain secondary.
  
But remember, who am I ? is the question of ever constant presence. Because when you ask - what was I ? or what I will be ? with these questions you will again miss the point and your mind will come with some answers as memories of the past or will fill you with some vivid imagination of the future and you will remain unsolved.
  
The real meditation is to live in the present, be in the present so totally that it magnifies. A moment will come when your awareness and your consciousness is pure, without any impurities of past memories or the imaginary future. When you are unblemished, untouched with all this rubbish, you will become so sharp and alert that you can witness the true meditation which is - your sleep.
  Sleep - this meditation has been with you naturally since your birth. Everyday you are in this world, in this body and suddenly you sleep and enter into a different world, in a different body and you call it a dream world. But coming with the memories of the dream world is not meditation. Meditation is to be so aware, so alert that you can witness the entrance, the gateway, the junction, the no-man's land, an unknown unrealised space in between waking and sleeping. Your real meditation is to find out what is your state between these two worlds, when you leave this world and this body and before entering into the dream world and into your dream body - what ever is your naked state in that dividing space will reveal your total purity - who you are. You will be amazed, blissfully submerging into your own knowledge. And whole existence will acknowledge it celebrating. 
  2.    Remember, the whole psyche of enlightenment is female. The very soul is female. But the mind has the male quality, active and aggressive, whether it is of a man or a woman.
  Have you noticed you can do anything, but you cannot do meditation ? Because meditation is not a doing, it is a non - action, passive state, feminine state. For that reason you will find not a single woman is running after enlightenment, only the men are. Women are running after something beyond, something beyond enlightenment, which we call love. Here, also, you can be in love, but you cannot do it. The moment you try to do it, you will miss it because then you are entering into the male mind.
  For a man, awakening happens through enlightenment, which opens in him the whole civilization of the feminine mind, and then only he can also feel what love is really.
  Remember, something is hidden behind you, beyond your ego - your essential nature, your very soul. So do not remain holding anything back halfheartedly as a split personality. Meditate, make both sides of you together as a totality. Because if you want to make any wish fulfilled, then what about the other half ? The other half may not be in agreement with you. In meditation, when your heart is absolutely silent and receptive, in that state of nothingness, you become complete, love filled with bliss.
  3.      Remember, your mind is always active and creative; but your soul is silent and meditative. This silence is not of the graveyard, it is not dead, as you may think. It is the silence of the garden, fragrant and vibrant with life. Mind is not the source of joy, it can only create misery, not ecstatic blissfulness. The mind always wants to do something, it is very restless, so it creates problems. Be aware that something more is beyond your mind. When you reach that beyond, then whatever you create will be of immense joy.
  When you are meditative, slowly, slowly you go beyond mind and also beyond problems. The moment your mind is washed away you are left with a silent brain, with no noise. In that innocence of your brain your whole being will be aware of something new we call the soul. Once you have found your soul, you get filled with an all-pervasive alive state of ecstasy. Become more meditative so that your creativity can be secondary, to encounter your real state, of being, of ecstasy. So that out of that state whatever you create will have the real flavour of your soul.
  So remember, if you want the higher values of life, they are beyond the reach of your active mind. Its doing is not of any value, your being is valuable. To be oneself is the highest creativity. Be open, be love, in the heart be silent, be receptive. A perfect musician throws away the instrument, when he knows that the instrument can create only sound, but the silence is created by him. Surrender, and be more meditative to enjoy more.
  4.      Remember, in any situation - live life to the fullest. You have seen cows: whether they eat green grass or dry hay you will always find cream in the milk. When you remember that there is always cream within you - your blissfulness, then by any situation in your life you will never be pulled down. Even the worst situation, you will cross fearlessly and will always reach the comfort zone sooner and beautifully.
  You do not have to conquer this world first and become rich to realise your cheerful blissfulness. It is already there as your innermost quality. So be loose and natural and all other richness will be added unto you. Celebrate this life, this moment, and enjoy every moment of it. Do not fear to become joyous, because it is your fear that makes you a slave. It is your fear, in fact, that forces you to make others slaves, too, before they can try to enslave you. Devoid of seriousness in life, your joyousness will make you master of you and then no one will dare to pull you down. Instead they will be in your spell of loveliness, which everyone is dreaming of.
  So do not compromise yourself away from your joy for small, small reasons in life. Your compromise will always lead you away from the truth. Your truth that you are here and now can not be compromised; either you know it and live it, being here and now, or you don't. Flow with your natural current of life energy Kundalini like a river because stagnant pools never meet the ocean, only rivers can. So remember, live life to the fullest right now. Can you live in any moment other than this one ?
  5. Remember, everything which is real and has authentic values in life has arisen out of meditation and there is no other way. And remember, your mind cannot evaluate something which is beyond its reach. That is your imagination. When you are in meditation and not entangled in your thoughts you go deeper towards your heart and you will encounter the higher reality. You will find your understanding is fading away because the real thing, experiencing, has taken its place, and your experiencing goes further. You will start experiencing that the being is still higher, and yet there are realities higher than your being. Once you start experiencing it you will see it has its own authority, it is not, then, an imaginary understanding; you start tasting it from all over.
  You will start feeling the real contentment. Real contentment means contentment which comes and never leaves you again. Any contentment which comes and goes again is not real, it is just a small gap between your two miseries. Your happiness, your cheerfulness, your richness, your bliss, your enlightenment or self-illumination, whatever you call it, if it comes and goes, then that is simply an illusion, a dream, but when it comes and never goes then it is real. Truth has its beginning, it knows no end. Once you know it - it will change your whole consciousness, you will become the authority, you will never compromise with anything less and your contentment will become your whole being.
  6. Enjoy your physical existence fully, go deeper in all your enjoyment because hidden behind it is your spiritual growing, is your spiritual blissfulness. When you are tired of physical pleasures only then you would like to know - is there something more ? And it is automatic, you will be filled with this question. This will be your authentic quest, not superficial. Only then are you progressing towards your soul, your real truth, unknowingly. So remember, only when your question is not intellectual but is existential, will you find within yourself something more. But don't forget, only your search for pleasure will bring you to the ultimate bliss.
  Then you will know that your mind had many questions before but was not receptive of any answer. Only your heart, which knows only love and trust, has always been silently waiting, knowing no question. Your mind always questions and receives no answer, your heart never questions and yet it has the answer. It never denies connection with your being, your soul; and all that is valuable comes out from your heart - your love is a proof.
  When you come to me carrying your mind you remain a disciple, your mind makes you jumping like monkeys - one branch to other, one guru to another guru; but when your heart takes over then happens a revolution; then you are no more a disciple - you are a devotee. Your false questioning ego drops; your innocence opens your inner door of being - your step towards enlightenment - which was always there.
  7. In the beginning, if there was only God, and God desired creation, and there was nothing except God, there was no material to create from nor any space to create into, then God appeared as desire and God appeared as creation. And because desire was the first appearance of God so, in nature, desire is in the heart of every being. Accept your desire as your godliness and it will be fulfilled.
  Even a fragment of pure gold is still gold in its purity. A single grain of sugar also contains sweetness. A drop of the ocean has the same saltiness and the wateriness as the ocean. So the quality of godhood is inherent in you.
  But a drop in the ocean is still the ocean. So drop your drop-ness and dissolve in the ocean. You will then realise that you haven't lost yourself, you have found your being, your ocean-hood. You have solved the meaning of life. And your Kundalini has unfolded itself.
  You all are like a river and just as every river runs towards the ocean, you also are running towards your fulfilment, towards your ultimate peak of consciousness, towards your ultimate being, and it is automatic. My guidance, meditation and constant reminder is so that you do not get soaked or absorbed before you reach your oceanic state. Just remain like a mirror, enjoy everything, whatever reflects in you, but do not get identified or lost in it.
  8. Remember, in your richness or in poverty, in your health or in your sickness, in your happiness or in sadness, in your virtue or in your crime, in your love or in your hate; if someone still loves you, it means they have accepted you.
  Love is acceptance. You cannot half accept someone and you cannot half love someone. If you accept someone not only from your peripheral outer feelings but also from your inner being it becomes total and that is what you feel as love. Love is total acceptance. If you are not total then your love is not real.
  Real acceptance comes from within. Suppose you are devoted to Krishna and one day Krishna appears in front of you, if you do not believe your eyes, and say it is just your imagination or a hallucination, it means you had not accepted Krishna from your inner core in the first place.
  This happens with the Guru also. When a disciple accepts the Guru totally then the Guru is there. When there is a true disciple there is a Sat-Guru. When a child is born, a mother is also born. When you come to me I see halfheartedness. This halfheartedness brings no real results.
  Accept yourself totally so that you can accept others totally. This is the principle of love.
  9. When you look at yourself you will realize that your life, your being here, is a big joke played by this vast existence. You don't know who you are, you don't know your journey, your starting point or where you will be after this state, after this life cycle, after this body. You know nothing about you. Not only that, you completely ignore this subject altogether. But you try to learn about worldly things and so called spiritual things and then you try to teach them, and you become serious, and you feel inside that you are missing something. And that missing point is you. The total ignorance of you, including your daily happenings - like dreams into which you go and come back without knowing what they are, where you had been, how you went there, how you came back. But you become full of words, read books on this missing subject, go to teachers and masters of this subject and start borrowing and analyzing their words, and finally you find that they are also doing the
 same thing you are doing. Then you get filled with an ego, very subtle, very refined, and very spiritual. Then you start comparing me, also, with other so called masters and feel yourself as a judge. But I see this again as a big joke on you that you don't know anything about you. So the best thing is to take joke as joke, and never take anything seriously. Become playful, joyous and natural. And your natural state will fill you with love, devotion and surrender and bliss of your being.
  10.     If you really are looking for the truth, the meaning of life, and you feel empty without it, then do not fill this gap by collecting things. Your outer fulfilment can not take the place of your inner fulfilment. Save yourself. Free your inner being. Make your inner journey towards your soul, which is far more real than this outside existence and this body, which is just an appearance. 
  Remember, the truth cannot be taught, it can only be caught. Being near a burning flame you get warmth, you may even catch fire. Similarly you will catch truth just by coming near to the Guru. Don't get confused with the word Guru. It does not mean teacher. A teacher is dealing with your mind by teaching it. Teacher can never be called Guru. Guru and his meditation is for you, whatever you are, not the mind.
  The Guru's meditation is neither contemplation nor concentration; it is living in contact with existence with no mind in between. The moment the mind is absent, there is no barrier between you and the Divine; and in the absence of your mind your heart cannot draw boundaries because it cannot define. Then something fresh, something pure and beautiful happens as you move from your heart to your being.
  11. Remember, your natural qualities are - anger, sex, greed, lust, attachment, pride and ego. As long as you are in this world you can't get rid of them. They are like seven holes of a flute or seven notes of music. Your body is just like a musical instrument. In your body what you call seven centres of energy, starting from base of your spine - base centre, sex centre, navel centre, heart centre, neck centre, third eye centre and top crown of your head the Sahasrar centre; they all correspond to your inherent qualities. These seven centres also correspond to the main elements of this world which is earth for solidity, water for liquidity, fire for illumination, air for lightness, sky for vastness, ether for consciousness, and beyond for ultimate.
  Tantra accepts not only sex but all your seven qualities so that through meditations your life can become a harmonious melody. You can then create and experience - truth, energy, bliss, beauty, love and compassion. The Mantra vibrates the seven centres - repeat it in every breath without thinking or resting from it and you will realise with a surprise that a tremendous energy has unfolded and arisen in you like a thunderbolt tickling you all over. This experience of your awakened life energy force is enough to understand what this is all about and what I say every day.
  The Sat-Guru's words are like a fresh running spring. By the time you receive this letter some of its freshness is already gone. So come more often into the presence of the Sat-Guru to saturate with the eternal freshness.
  12.    Do not waste your energy in becoming a worthy disciple. I do not have to depend on your worthiness. My worthiness is enough. My worthiness of being a Guru is going to make you a worthy disciple. Be sceptical. Do not believe anything unless you have experienced it. Experiencing does not mean imagination or hallucination. 
  Remember Truth is beyond head and heart. It is in your consciousness indifferent to the mind and the heart. So meditate to explore your consciousness. Meditation will always keep you coming nearer to the source of your being. Nothing can be sweeter than to come in contact with the immortal, timeless, deathless, source of life. 
  BLESSINGS:
  Remember, even if you think that you know everything, then try to know about you - who you are - the knower, and you will know that you know nothing. Your innermost core is not ignorance but unknown nothingness - your only object of worship, which I call - the ultimate void. From this no-thingness everything has appeared, all the outermost carnival. The eternal void is all encompassing. Your innermost core is meditative, ecstatic and blissful and your outer being is sexuality.
  When I say blissfulness, it does not mean happiness because happiness is part of unhappiness. Happiness is worthless, it depends on unhappiness. If you want happiness then unhappiness will always remain in the background. Your inner desire is unknown - the third dimension without any opposite to it and that is bliss with truth, super-consciousness and beauty - serene and tranquil. In fact we are all hanging on to that unknown emptiness - the void, yet looking for it, knowingly or unknowingly. We are lost in what is lost; we are looking at what we are looking for.
  What we call empty, or the void, is a form of the full. What we call nothing is a form of reality. What we call existence is a kind of non-existence. It is the third dimension of everything - from where everything originates. It is everyone's sub-conscious longing to become one with the source. The source from where you feel your presence - that you are. But when you try to look back from where your feeling of presence is coming, you only find a crystal clear vastness of sky-like emptiness. Just meditate this void like state day and night internally and externally if you like to know yourself, and then once you know yourself nothing else is of value. Submerge into the source and become original.
  There is nothing to be found, there is no truth which is hidden. It is only your eyes which are closed. You have always opened your eyes away from your own truth and your own truth is lying within you. The moment your eyes open within, into the depth of your consciousness, you will be amazed, you will know that there lies the very root from where you are joined with the whole existence and its mystery.
   

       
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