[Advaita-l] Thanks for all the very experienced comments on self realisation

Suresh Marur suresh.marur at gmail.com
Mon Sep 20 23:57:33 CDT 2010

Vijaya ji,

To the question on whether reacting to a subordinate's rudeness is egoistic,
I dont think it is based on the reaction per se. It is perfectly possible to
show anger to the rude behaviour (which is not reaction in the first place)
than to "be" angry. We do that with our children. When they do something
wrong, we can always chide them without boiling inside. It is when we ask,
"how can he behave like this to me?" we are reacting. If we come from the
viewpoint, "the behaviour is rude and is detrimental to the office
environment and also bad for the employee's growth" then it is an action.
The external behaviour may appear the same. It is the attitide in the mind
that tells if it is an action or a reaction.

Swami Dayanandaji's small book called "Action and Reaction" explains this
very beautifully and I have found it quite beneficial to critique my own
self and know when I am reacting and when I am acting.

Another example is from Shri Ramakrishna. If I were an enlightened snake, it
is not that I will allow someone to just kill me because to bite is himsa. I
have every right to hiss and bite (in that order) and protect myself
according to my dharma. So, at work and even at home, as part of sadhana, we
do not have to accept improper behaviour and allow people to get away with
it. We can resist as long as it does not arise from our egos but from the
view point of maintaining propriety at work and facilitating our own and
others' spiritual growth. Then office work also becomes upasana.

Of course, my search for an enlightened grihastha and/or office worker

- Suresh

On Mon, Sep 20, 2010 at 2:29 AM, vijaya1.kambhampati at tiscali.co.uk <
vijaya1.kambhampati at tiscali.co.uk> wrote:

> Hi to all,
> Thank you to all for their kind and very experienced comments on where
> a very ordinary person stands with respect to the need for self
> realisation in his or her life.
> As Sunilji says 'real sanyasha should be in spirit, one has to
> practice it in real lifre through selfless work. We cannot be egoless
> just theoretically'.
> However, in life and while working we expect people to be kind to us
> and polite to us. Is that being egoistic or expecting too much. So how
> attached must we be to how people treat us at work. The director of a
> company would react if her/his secretary was rude to her/him.- as it is
> not workable. Would that be egoistic. Sometimes it may be the other way
> round and a senior cleverer person may be rude unnecessarily to a
> junior staff he may be angry with.  How should the junior staff react
> to rude behaviour or would you say that all behaviour towards us is
> asked for by us in this birth or previous birth.
> I was also happy to agree with Kuntimaddi ji when he wrote about the
> requirement for a quiet mind to self realise-  'If the mind is purified
> enough then it first sees the viswarauupa of the Lord - as His presence
> everywhere. The all pervading Lord cannot be only in Himalayas, right?
> For that I need to understand the nature of Brahman and the nature of
> this world as mithyaa - it is an understanding as understanding as a
> fact not just as a thought. Calm and quiet environment is helpful for
> any serious study and contemplation and more so when I am trying to
> divert my mind to the subtlest of all- the self that I am.'
> My only worry being that I do not see myself at this moment as being
> able to renounce worldly attachments for many years. I find it hard to
> be quiet most moments of the day. While I can avoid or blot out
> thoughts, in the process I could also lose alertness which is a
> hindrance to awakening I have heard.
> This takes me to the point by Nagarajan ji that ' We can do a simple
> test, where we can try to sit in one
> >place for an hour.? If we are honest, we will find that we are unable
> to do
> >so because of constant chattering and the corresponding association
> that is
> >going on our mind.? So, it wouldn't matter if we sit in our house or
> >himalayas, our >thoughts are our enemy.? It is not easy to control
> the modification of the
> >mind.? It takes time to aware of our vasanas and gain purification of
> mind
> >through Sadhana'.
> You are right Nagarajan ji - To quieten the mind is very difficult as
> the ego feels redundant. To act for the lord without thoughts would
> make me feel out of control and my ego would feel useless. The notion
> that I thought of the good deed  to do for the day makes me feel in
> control even if all good acts are god ordained.
> And finally I have found it reassuring that as Srikanta ji quotes
> 'Shankara Bhagawatpada in his
> >commentaries on Brahmasutras,Upanishads,Bhagawadgita reiterates that
> >Self-realization is within everyone's reach.No vidhi or kriya can
> help one
> >to attain it.His illustious disciple,Sureshwaracharya also in his
> >"Naishkarmyasiddhi"again and again says that self-realization is
> possible
> >in this very birth.'
> I think the problem for many of us aspirants is that we are so
> enamoured with the material world itself, that we may not at the bottom
> of our heart desire to ever leave it even though it is maya. Eternal
> bliss seems nice but unachievable as we are so stuck on the world of
> matter. Until some unpleasant situation develops in our life we do not
> seek self realisation because we have made it our mission in life to
> have pleasurable moments only and importantly do not have the endurance
> to cope with anything else.
> Anyhow, in conclusion I have also heard that in Kali yug, moksha will
> be achieved more quickly by those who try. I may be wrong !!!!!!
> Thank you to Advaita list for answering my quetions so kindly.
> Best Wishes,
> Vijaya Kambhampati.
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