[Advaita-l] WHAT AM "I"

[Akilesh Ayyar]

Sudhanshuji,

When you say the word "I," you have immediately created a distinction, a
separation, a boundary. All such distinctions are in fact absolutely
non-existent.

The only utterable, thinkable "I" is the one which is the wrong I. The
"right I" is not thinkable -- so unthinkable that even to call it
unthinkable is wrong, because it is not an "it" with qualities like
unthinkability. Even to call it the "right I" is wrong.

Another way of saying the same thing is that all words are ultimately
meaningless. This is why the truest verbal definition of Brahman is just
neti, neti.

All this is why in Ribhu Gita you find passages like the following:


*The existence as “this is,” “I am,” or “the world is,” *the faulty notions
about one’s own inner faculties,
the actions of one’s inner faculties,
any kind of misconception such as one’s own life,
one’s own death,
one’s own birth,
“there is an Isvara,” [god]
“I am the jiva,” [embodied individual]
or “the world is,”
the substance of delusion,
the substance of greatness,
the substance of thought,
“full of the world,”
whatever is shown by the scriptures,
whatever is expressed in the Veda-s,
the exhortation “It is One,”
talk of duality,
any mis­apprehension that “I am Siva,”
the misapprehension that “I am Brahma,”
the misapprehension that “I am Vishnu,”
the misunder­standing that the world exists,
the misunderstanding that some little difference exists,
the misunderstanding that some little duality exists,
the certitude that “all is,”
the certitude that “all is not,”
the certitude that “all is Brahman,”
the universe of one’s own con­templation,
the manifest universe of one’s own recollection,
the phenomenal universe of the nature of sorrow and
the manifold universe of the nature of joy,
the phenomenal universe of “duality and nonduality,” and
the manifold universe of “reality and unreality,”
the phenomenal world of wakefulness, and, likewise,
the manifold world of dreams,
the phenomenon of the knowledge of the deep sleep state or the phenomenon
of the knowledge of the “fourth state,”
the phenomenal world of Vedic knowledge,
the manifold world of scriptural knowledge,
the phenomenal world of sinful thoughts or the manifold world of differing
merits,
the phenomenal world of the nature of knowledge,
the manifold world of the knowledge of the attributeless,
the phenomenal world of qualities or absence thereof,
the determination of defects and nondefects,
the investigation into reality and unreality,
the investi­gation into the mobile and the immobile,
the “true conviction that the Self is one,”
the concept that the Self is important,
the certitude that the phenomenal world is nonexistent and that all is
Brahman,
statements that the “differences aris­ing out of duality and nonduality
exist not, exist not,”
the certitude that the world is, indeed, unreal and all is Brahman,
the ideas of cause and effect, and the unsettling due to multiple
differences—


*renouncing and throwing away thus and all that give various mantra-s, be
steadfastly established in yourself forever.*


On Fri, Jun 7, 2019 at 9:25 AM Sudhanshu Shekhar <sudhanshu.iitk at gmail.com>
wrote:

> Akhilesh ji,
>
> Can you please elaborate upon // In a very important sense, the I is
> precisely what is absolutely non-existent, as non-existent as the horn of a
> hare//.
>
> Regards.
> Sudhanshu.
>
> On Fri 7 Jun, 2019, 18:43 Akilesh Ayyar, <ayyar at akilesh.com> wrote:
>
>> Namaste,
>>
>> But my point is that technically, Brahman is beyond I and not-I, is
>> beyond is and is not, and is beyond something and nothing. In a very
>> important sense, the I is precisely what is absolutely non-existent, as
>> non-existent as the horn of a hare. In the end, nothing can be said that is
>> true, and so one must fall silent. It is that living silence which is the
>> real teaching of Vedanta.
>>
>> On Fri, Jun 7, 2019 at 3:05 AM Sudhanshu Shekhar <
>> sudhanshu.iitk at gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>>> Hari Om,
>>>
>>> "I am something" just means that it is not that I am nothing. I am not
>>> horn of hare.. this is what is meant by "I am something".
>>>
>>> What I said abot I is what silence is. It is nothing which can be
>>> conceived of. And yet it is. That silence is not horn of hare. And that
>>> silence cannot be conceived of.
>>>
>>> Sudhanshu.
>>>
>>> On Fri 7 Jun, 2019, 12:29 Akilesh Ayyar via Advaita-l, <
>>> advaita-l at lists.advaita-vedanta.org> wrote:
>>>
>>>> Namaste,
>>>>
>>>> "Thus, a complete description of I is as follows: I am something. And I
>>>> am
>>>> not that which I can even think about."
>>>>
>>>> Not quite. To say "I am something" is also a thought with all the
>>>> accompanying limitations. Thus the only complete description is silence.
>>>>
>>>> On Fri, Jun 7, 2019 at 2:28 AM Sudhanshu Shekhar via Advaita-l <
>>>> advaita-l at lists.advaita-vedanta.org> wrote:
>>>>
>>>> > Hari Om,
>>>> >
>>>> > I am something. I am not nothing. And I am not that which I can see,
>>>> hear,
>>>> > smell, touch, taste, feel, decide, or identify with. I am not that
>>>> which I
>>>> > can think or visualize.
>>>> >
>>>> > This is a complete description of myself.
>>>> >
>>>> > Any word of Shruti which appears to describe "I" positively is
>>>> nothing but
>>>> > negation alone. "I" cannot be described positively. So words like
>>>> Satyam,
>>>> > Jnanam, Anantam etc are not positive but negative description alone.
>>>> For
>>>> > eg, I am jnanam. So let us not think that Shruti indicates me as some
>>>> sort
>>>> > of "light of awareness" or "consciousness" etc. But She is merely
>>>> saying
>>>> > that I am not jada.
>>>> >
>>>> > Thus, a complete description of I is as follows: I am something. And
>>>> I am
>>>> > not that which I can even think about.
>>>> >
>>>> > Regards,
>>>> > Sudhanshu.
>>>> >
>>>> >
>>>> >
>>>> > On Fri 7 Jun, 2019, 09:55 Belavadi Shankar via Advaita-l, <
>>>> > advaita-l at lists.advaita-vedanta.org> wrote:
>>>> >
>>>> > > Please read Ashtawakra Samhita.
>>>> > >
>>>> > > On Fri, Jun 7, 2019 at 7:53 AM sreenivasa murthy via Advaita-l <
>>>> > > advaita-l at lists.advaita-vedanta.org> wrote:
>>>> > >
>>>> > > > Dear friends,WHAT AM " I "? This  is  the  question
>>>> > > > which will be in the mind of
>>>> > > > a sincere student  of  Vedanta.The  answer  for  the  above  vital
>>>> > > > question  is :
>>>> > > > The  uncreated , unborn,  light of  awareness  is what  I  am.
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > That is  the basis  substratum,  andcontainer  of  all
>>>> experiences.
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > Theworld, senses, body,  mind,  waking, dreaming,  sleeping,
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > knowledge,  lack of  knowledge,  consciousness,
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > unconsciousness– whatever  can  be framed  as  some
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > kind  of experience—these  are  allappearances  in  this
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > changeless  reality of  my  being.
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > I  am prior  to  those things  and  yet  Icontain  them  all.
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > No  experience is  separate  and apart  from  what I  am.
>>>> > > >
>>>> > > > UNQUOTE.
>>>> > > > Is it  not  the message  of  the  Upanishads?
>>>> > > > Allof  us should  cognize  this within  ourselves  by   ourselves
>>>> > > > so that we can be krutArthas.
>>>> > > >  Withrespectful namaskars,SreenivasaMurthy.
>>>> > > >
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